My First Love

Are there really good men in this world? Sure there are...men that are true, just, honest. Men who stick closer than even a brother and are just absolutely on point...lol.

Abisha was one of this in so many ways. Abisha was tall, fair and handsome. He was also emotionally healthy and was way balanced on the inside and outside that I just couldn't resist him. Well I have tried way over seven (7) months to resist him. I had friend zoned him and place him on a 9 on the dreaded friend-zone scale of 0 to 10. I just wasn't ready for relationships as I had wanted the first man I ever dated to be the one I ended up with. So Him talking love/ dating was something I wasn't ready to get myself entangled in. Besides, he was way way older than me and that was supposed to be my perfect excuse...lol.

Anyways, the attraction between Abisha and I isn't really the main subject of this post but the man Abisha was in the healthy part of our relationship. Abisha was a man greatly invested in building up his little girl. He was a man that taught me so many principles on being a better me. He taught me to play, to talk and be in charge of myself and emotions (the list actually goes on).

I remember this guy was there to check about 90% of every assignments I ever submitted in school, make necessary corrections and email it back to me before I submitted.

Abisha also taught me how to control my emotions and maturely handle differences. I remember practical cases where Abisha taught me the act of "talking" out dislikes, offenses and not dramatizing or nagging the normal way most ladies do. It was literally a more stress-free, fun, unique and amazing way of handling differences to which I am grateful I learnt early enough.

From Abisha I learnt how to care deeply for someone I love and also learnt the act of trust. (yea...I was in a relationship but had 0.01% level of trust). Abisha also taught me "the act of compromise" and the "lets meet at the middle strategy" that makes all relationship work.

True...I was tough, inflexible and practically suck with some of my own childish ways of doing things (let me spare you some of those funny details) but then I was also stuck with someone who did not give up on improving me in the best way he could and while he could.

Although Abisha and I finally met some obstacles in which compromise wasn't just an option, you know sometimes things just happen. we all also have our strength and weaknesses which sometimes affects our actions and inactions in general. 

A saying however goes that "people come into your life for a reason, some for a season and some for a life time". Although Abisha may probably not have been part of "the for life" people in terms of the relationship aspect, I am kind of certain he fulfilled the reason behind our being destined to meet in that season.

My conclusion therefore is that we should strive to be people who add value to others, improve others, seek to make a better them and above all be people who never give up on others. We would not always be together (in most cases)...there is also another popular saying  that "twenty (20) children would not play together for twenty (20) years". Life indeed just has a way of taking us in various directions. 

The most important thing however is to strive to impact others wherever we find ourselves in such a way that 5 years from now or even 15 years from now, they can look back, remember you and be grateful for the part you played at certain points in their life's journey.

Seek out relationships that leaves you improved.

Cheers!!!